Justice for All (The Outcast Book #1) Read online

  “What…what are you doing here?”

  “Father Barclay called your sister. They said you tried to kill one of your classmates.”

  “I wasn’t trying to kill her. I just wanted to hurt her. A lot.” I look around the infirmary. “Where is she?”

  “They took her to the hospital. Her mother is going to be furious.”

  “Good.” I narrow my eyes at Carol. “You know who her mother is, don’t you?”

  “I’m sorry, Robin. If I’d known she was here I would have asked Jessica to send you somewhere else.”

  “Where is Jessica?”

  “She’s talking with the headmistress and Father Barclay. Needless to say, they’re pretty pissed off.”

  “I don’t care. She deserved it.”

  Carol sits down on the edge of the bed. She brushes hair back from my face. “You want to talk about it, kid?”

  “No.”

  “Oh come on, you can either tell me now or I’ll hear it in court.”

  “Court?”

  “Her mother might press charges. You did a real number on her kid’s face.”

  “Good.”

  “It’s not good. If she figures out who you are, we’ll have to move you to another school. That is if you’re not locked up in juvie. So come on, tell me what happened.”

  I sigh and then tell her about Colin and the Valentine’s Day dance. “I don’t know how she found out about it. She just had to gloat about it at lunch. And I guess…I guess I snapped.”

  Carol hugs me close as I start to cry the way I did the night of the dance. “It’s all right. I don’t blame you. That girl is a real piece of work. Doesn’t mean you should have pounded her face in.”

  “I’m thorry,” I mumble, punctuating it with a hiccup.

  “I’m going to talk with your sister and the father. Maybe I can convince them it was PMS.”

  “It was not!”

  “They don’t need to know that.” She gives me a wink on her way out. I sigh and then lean back against the bed as much as I can.

  There’s no TV or radio or anything, so I can only listen to my own breathing and the old building settling. I curse how stupid I was to risk everything to get even with that bitch. It had felt really good, but that doesn’t matter. I could end up in juvenile hall or even prison if they decide to try me as an adult.

  I start to cry harder as I imagine what Daddy would think of this. He would be so disappointed in me. He was the most honest cop on the whole force, the one guy who wouldn’t take bribes, and now his daughter could end up in prison. “I’m thorry, Daddy,” I whimper. “I’m tho thorry.”

  I’m still crying into my pillow when I hear Jessica say, “You are the luckiest little girl in the whole universe. You know that?”

  I look up and sniffle. “What?”

  “They aren’t going to press charges. The school or that girl’s mother. You’re off the hook. That hook anyway.”

  “How?”

  “Basically by convincing them that you’re a very troubled girl. Not that they needed much convincing for that. You’re going to be put into solitary for the next two months. They’re making up a bed in the janitor’s closet. You’re going to sleep, eat, and do your homework in there. They thought of making you do your business in a bucket, but they decided that would be too inhumane.

  “You’re going to help the cafeteria staff with meals and the dishes. Oh, and you’re going to see Dr. Tyrell once a week.”

  “Him? Why?”

  “There isn’t a shrink in Evettsville and he thinks you’re a really interesting case.”

  “What about Tonya?”

  “She should be fine. Her nose might be a little crooked, but that’s about it.”

  “That’s it?”

  “Yes.” Jessica sits on a chair and then sighs into her hands. “I don’t know what to do with you anymore. After Dad died I tried. I really tried to raise you like he would, but I guess I did a really bad job of it.”

  “It’s not your fault. It’s my fault.”

  She gets up to take the same place on the bed as Carol earlier. Like Carol she brushes hair away from my face. “I know this isn’t a great place, but it’s the best we could do on short notice. Can you manage to stay out of trouble for a couple more months? Then you can come home and we’ll start over fresh. We’ll forget all this stuff with Madame Crimson and her bitch daughter. Deal?”

  “Deal.” We hug to seal our pact, though it’s kind of awkward with my right hand cuffed to the bed.

  Jessica pats my head and then says, “Actually, I’ve been looking to sell the house.”

  “What? Why?”

  “Even after you get out of here, it won’t be safe there. Not really. We can take whatever we get from the house and what I’ve managed to save and go out west. Some little town in Texas or New Mexico where no one will think to look. What do you think?”

  “Maybe you could move to Evettsville.”

  “So you can be close to that boy?”

  “His name is Colin.”

  “Oooh, sounds like you like him.”

  “Just because I’m handcuffed doesn’t mean I still couldn’t kick your ass.”

  “I’d like to see you try, tough guy,” she says with a grin. “We’ll talk about it later, OK?”

  “OK.”

  “I wish I could stay longer, but I’ve got work tomorrow. A double shift thanks to someone.”

  “Sorry.”

  “Try not to get into any more trouble, OK? I’m not sure we’ll be able to bail you out next time.”

  “I promise I won’t.”

  “Good.” She gives me another awkward hug and then she’s gone. I lean back on my bed again to listen to the silence.

  Part 4

  Chapter 21

  It’s my fifth session with Dr. Tyrell and for the fifth time I tell him what happened with Tonya. He nods along, making notations on his legal pad. I finally stop with a huff. “What’s the point? I’ve told you all this already. There’s nothing more to say.”

  “All right, then let’s talk about something else. Melanie Holloway. She’s your roommate.”

  “Yes.”

  “And your friend?”

  “Yes.”

  “She is very protective of you. I had her in here for an hour and she wouldn’t say a bad word about you.”

  “Why should she?”

  “You did break a girl’s nose with a cafeteria tray.” He looks at his notes. “Miss Holloway thinks it was completely justified. Would you agree?”

  “No.”

  “Why not?”

  I shrug. “It was stupid. It jeopardized everything. Me, my sister, Carol, and even Melanie.”

  “So she’s wrong?”

  I shrug again. “She’s just sticking up for me. That’s what friends do.”

  “And would you do the same for her?”

  “I already stuck up for her. On the train.”

  He raises an eyebrow. “She’s the girl you saved?”

  “Yes.”

  “Does she know that?”

  “No. I haven’t told her anything about my old life.”

  “You don’t trust her?”

  “I don’t want her to get involved in any of this. I mean, more involved than I’ve already gotten her.”

  “You care about her.”

  “So?”

  “And she cares about you too, doesn’t she?”

  “Yes.” I study him for a moment and then add, “We’re not gay or anything.”

  “You don’t think she feels that way about you?”

  “I wouldn’t know.” That’s something I haven’t thought about. “She knows I like boys.”

  “Colin Mayfield.”

  “Yes. You haven’t talked to him, have you?” I really don’t want my shrink visiting Colin to let him know I’m a total head case.

  “No. Not yet. Do you think I should?”

  “No!” Before I can blurt out anything stupid, I take a deep breath and t
hen brush hair away from my face. “I don’t want him to know about…this.”

  “Everything we discuss is private. It’s doctor-patient confidentiality.”

  “But he’d still know I’m seeing a shrink. He’d think I’m crazy.”

  “Would he?”

  “Duh. What else would he think if a shrink comes around asking about me?”

  “That’s a good point. How are things between you and Colin?”

  “I haven’t talked to him since it happened. Sister Mary Francis won’t let me use the phone except to call home. Do you…do you think you could mail a letter for me? They won’t let me have any stamps either.”

  “You’ve written him a letter?”

  “Uh-huh. You’re not going to make me read it to you, are you?”

  “Not if you don’t want to.”

  “Good. It’s kind of mushy, you know? Romantic stuff.”

  He makes another notation on his pad. “You have romantic feelings for Mr. Mayfield?”

  “We kissed a few times.”

  “I’m talking about your feelings, Robin. How would you describe the way you feel about Colin?”

  “I like him. I mean, I really like him.”

  “You care for him?”

  “Yes.”

  “You love him?”

  “No! I mean, not like that Romeo & Juliet stuff, you know?”

  “I’m not sure I do.”

  I look down at my feet and try to think of how to express what I feel. “It’s hard to explain. This last month I haven’t been able to see him, I feel…I feel empty, you know? Like there’s a piece of me missing. It’s almost like when Daddy died.”

  “But Colin’s not dead, is he?”

  “I know, but he might as well be. The nuns won’t let me see him or talk to him and by the time I get out of here he’ll have probably found someone else.”

  “You don’t think he misses you as much as you miss him?”

  “I don’t know. I hope he does.” I sigh as I think of what happened during our snowmobile trip, how I almost ruined everything by being so insecure. “I don’t know why he asked me out to start with. I mean, I’m not pretty. Not as pretty as Tonya. And I’m not rich like her either. Or as tall as her.”

  “But you have a better personality, don’t you?”

  I snicker, remembering Colin pretty much said the same thing. As I told him, I say, “That’s what you tell fat girls.”

  “Maybe it’s true.”

  “Yeah, right.”

  “Then why do you think Colin is interested in you?”

  “I dunno. He’s probably already decided I’m not worth the effort.”

  I fumble around in my backpack until I find the wrinkled envelope containing my love letter. “Can you mail this to him? Please?”

  “Certainly. You’re sure you don’t want to tell me what’s in here?”

  “Like I said, a lot of mushy stuff.” Most of it is to say goodbye to him. I told him how much I had enjoyed our time together and how much I wished I could see him again, but I couldn’t. Not with the nuns keeping me on lockdown. Maybe if we get a spring blizzard he’ll have a reason to come up here again, but otherwise I doubt I’ll get the chance.

  I’m glad I don’t start bawling in front of Dr. Tyrell; I know he’d have some interesting notes to write down at that. “Are we done for today?”

  “Just about. I talked with some of your teachers. I hope you don’t mind.”

  “It’s fine.”

  “Your grades have certainly improved since you came here. Your teachers all seem to think you’re very studious. Quiet even. That certainly doesn’t describe the girl I’ve seen, does it?”

  “Those nuns are kinda scary. They have those big rulers and stuff.”

  “If you don’t mind me editorializing a moment, I think it would behoove you to stay here a little longer. Academically it’s done wonders for you.”

  “You think I should stay here next year?”

  “As long as you don’t get yourself expelled. You don’t want to stay here?”

  “No. I want to go home.”

  “Because your sister is there or because Madame Crimson is there?”

  “I’m not going to do anything about that. I learned my lesson.”

  “Is that so? Sister Matilda says you’ve been training with her.” He looks down at his notes. “Aikido. That’s like karate, isn’t it?”

  “Sure, the same way an Escalade is like a Mini.” I glare at him a moment to let the sarcasm sink in, but of course he doesn’t even flinch. “I’m only learning it to protect myself.”

  “Is that how you would describe the incident with Tonya?”

  “No. There wasn’t anything like aikido in that. It was just an old-fashioned beatdown.”

  “You sound proud of it.”

  “I’m not proud of it. I’m not ashamed of it either.”

  “Because she deserved it?”

  “She is kind of a bitch.”

  He flashes that bright white smile of his. “Now we’re getting somewhere. It will certainly give us something to talk about next time.” He makes a show of slipping my letter into his briefcase. Then he shakes my hand the way he usually does. “I’ll see you next week.”

  “Thanks.” I follow him out of the office, but we go in different directions. He has a long drive back to Redoubt City and I have to go to work.

  ***

  I can’t work out with Sister Matilda anymore, but cleaning the dishes in the cafeteria is a good workout too. Scrubbing the dried-on gunk off the pots and pans is as good as doing a hundred reps with the dumbbell. By the time I’m finished, I can barely lift my arms.

  Tonya is waiting for me the second I emerge. Her bruises have healed by now, but there is a crooked set to her nose. Her voice is more nasal as she says, “Having fun with the dishes, Cinderella?”

  That’s her new nickname for me since I’ve essentially become an indentured servant. “It’s fine,” I say. I start towards the door, but of course she has to keep pace. We’re supposed to stay away from each other, which is only more incentive for Tonya to badger me.

  “You talk to Colin lately?”

  “You know I haven’t.”

  “Yeah, he’s not going to want to see you again. Not now that he knows what a freak you are.”

  I stop at the door to glare at her. “Can’t you just leave me alone? You won, OK?”

  She snorts at this. “Won? You call this winning?” She pats her crooked nose. “You better hope they can make it even cuter than before. Otherwise I might have to take yours.”

  She pinches the end of my nose. Despite how tired my arms are, I’m tempted to grab her wrist to cinch her arm behind her back. I can’t do that or else I’ll get expelled and something worse will probably happen to Jessica and Carol.

  “Later, Cinderella,” she says and then skips off.

  I sigh and then trudge back to the janitor’s closet they’ve stuffed me into. It’s smaller than a prison cell, with barely enough room for a cot that has to double as my desk. I’m sure my grades have gotten even better the last five weeks since I don’t have much else to do except my homework. I’ve started to actually work ahead; in a couple of weeks I’ll probably have to ask the nuns for extra work. I keep this pace up for a couple of years and I might make valedictorian.

  The harsh fluorescent light in the closet gives me a headache after a couple of hours. I lean back against the wall and close my eyes. It has been five weeks, but I still see Colin in the moonlight, surrounded by snow. I hope Dr. Tyrell mailed my letter, so at least Colin won’t think I’ve forgotten about him.

  There’s a knock on my door; probably the janitor needing something. I open the door to find Melanie there. I look around before I yank her inside and then close the door. “What are you doing here? If the nuns sees you—”

  “They won’t. Relax. I wanted you to hear the good news.”

  “What news?”

  “I mailed my comic to my brother
and he really likes it. He’s going to make some copies to sell in his store. Isn’t that awesome?”

  “It’s pretty awesome.” I give her a hug. “Congrats.”

  “He says if it sells he’ll want me to make a whole series. Wouldn’t that be epic?”

  “Yeah, but how would you do that with school?”

  “I can work on it in the summer. Get a head start, you know?” Her smile fades a little as she sits down on my cot. “I’m not sure what to write about. I mean, that first issue I wrote from real life, you know? Now I’d have to come up with a whole story from my imagination.”

  “Well, maybe you could have the Outcast go to a snooty boarding school, where she meets a really nasty girl named Tonya and bashes her face in with a tray.”

  I worry I’ve said too much, but Melanie giggles. “That would be pretty awesome.” Melanie gives me a hug. “I miss having you around. It’s so boring by myself, you know?”

  “Yeah. It’s pretty boring here too.”

  “It’s so mean of them to put you in this stupid closet. You should complain to someone.”

  “Then they’d probably just expel me.”

  “Oh, right. They probably would. It’s not fair.”

  “I know. It sucks.”

  “I should probably go before anyone sees me.”

  Melanie gets to her feet. Before she can open the door, I give her another hug. “I miss you too. You’re the best friend I’ve ever had.”

  “Really?”

  “Totally.”

  We both start to cry. It takes us a few minutes to compose ourselves. With a sniffle I say, “I’ll check to make sure no one’s coming.” I step outside to check the hallway and then motion Melanie to come out. She gives me another hug, far briefer than before, and then hurries away. Before she gets to the stairs she waves to me.

  I wave back. Then I go back into my closet to try to sleep.

  ***

  There’s a knock on the door to wake me up. I look up at the clock to see it’s six-thirty. Maybe there was a janitorial emergency. With a groan I sit up and then unlock the door.

  It’s not the janitor; it’s not Melanie either. Sister Matilda is in her full nun getup, which still looks weird to me. “Sister Mary Francis has called a special assembly in the chapel. Get dressed and then I’ll take you.”