Justice for All (The Outcast Book #1) Read online

  “I’m not sure how much of a turn-on that is for a guy.”

  “You just need to find the right guy.”

  “That’s kind of hard when we’re stuck here, isn’t it?”

  “Yeah. I wish this stupid snow would melt,” I say, though the snow made last night so magical. It’s kind of a mixed blessing.

  I’ve started on my partially-frozen peach cobbler when Sister Matilda comes over to our table. I almost don’t recognize her in the full nun outfit instead of her sweats. “Rose, could I speak to you for a moment?”

  “Sure.”

  I follow her out of the cafeteria, Tonya giving me a smug grin on my way out. She thinks I’m getting in trouble, but I’m not. Though from the pained look on Sister Matilda’s face, I doubt it’s good news. “I talked to Sister Mary Francis.”

  “She said no, right?”

  “I’m afraid so.”

  “That figures. She’d be happy if all we did was sit in our rooms and pray.”

  “I know you’re disappointed, Rose, but this isn’t the end. I’m going to talk to some of the others. Maybe they can convince Sister Mary Francis that it’s a good idea.” Sister Matilda puts a hand on my shoulder. She leans down to whisper, “I don’t want you to think of doing anything rash. Understand?”

  “Yes.” I should go confess to Father Barclay because I’m sure lying to a nun is a pretty bad sin.

  Chapter 19

  It’s over a week before the snow clears enough that the nuns can take some of us down to Evettsville. Sister Mary Francis hasn’t changed her mind about the dance, but about a half-dozen of us need to go down for medical care. Lucky me, I get to go to the dentist to have my braces checked.

  The dentist is an old guy named Dr. Maxwell, who spends almost an hour poking at my teeth and making interested-sounding grunts. “You’ve got a very pretty mouth, young lady.”

  “Thankth.”

  “I can’t see any cavities in here and your teeth seem nice and straight.”

  “Tho I can get thethe off?”

  “Not for a couple more months. We don’t want to remove them too soon. I know they seem like torture now, but you’ll appreciate them later once you’re a starlet in Hollywood.”

  I can’t help laughing at that. As if Hollywood would ever cast me except maybe as a zombie on The Walking Dead. “Thankth, Dr. Maxwell.”

  He tousles my hair in that annoying way old people do. “Just stay away from anything too gooey or sticky and next time you come back, we can take those braces off.”

  I nod and then trudge out to the waiting room. The nun who accompanied the three of us to the dentist must be in the bathroom, so I keep on walking, right out the door. I put up the hood of my parka to make it harder for anyone to identify me.

  For the first time since I left the city, I’m free to walk around on the sidewalk. There’s not a lot in Evettsville, just a hardware store, pharmacy, general store, a couple restaurants, and the usual stuff like that. I stop in front of a dress shop to gape at a pale yellow dress in the window. Yellow isn’t my favorite color, but I can imagine this dress on me as Colin sweeps me across the gym floor at the Valentine’s Day dance.

  I throw back my hood and then march into the store. There’s an old lady behind a counter; she looks up at me and smiles. “Hello, dear. Something I can help you with?”

  “Um, yeth,” I say, my mouth still a little sore from Dr. Maxwell’s exam. “I need a dreth. For a danth.”

  “Ah, yes, I’ve had quite a few girls coming in here to ask for something pretty to wear for the Valentine’s Day dance. You a student at the high school?”

  “At Thaint Martha’th.”

  “Goodness. I never would have imagined.”

  I smile as much as I can with my sore mouth. “I don’t look like a troublemaker?”

  “No, of course not. You look very sweet.”

  “Thankth.” I gesture to the dress in the window. “Do you have that thmall enough to fit me?”

  “Well, let’s find out.” She gets off her chair and then offers a hand to me. “I’m Rhonda Maxwell.”

  “Are you Dr. Maxwell’s wife?”

  “You know him?”

  I gesture to my teeth. “I wath jutht in hith offithe.”

  “That accounts for the lisp then. Sid is not always the most gentle with his patients.”

  “It wathn’t tho bad.”

  “You’re sweet to say that. Honestly, I think the only reason Sid has any patients is people don’t want to drive thirty miles to the next closest dentist.”

  I giggle nervously at this and wonder if this is good-natured ribbing or a sign of serious marital trouble. Mrs. Maxwell goes over to the front window to take the yellow dress down. She holds it up to my body, but as I figured it’s about a foot too long, the skirt overlapping my shoes. “I’m too thort,” I say.

  “Nonsense. It just needs a few alterations. Let’s get some measurements.” She hangs up the dress while I go over to stand on a stool. I take off my parka and blazer to make it easier for her to get accurate measurements. She sounds almost like her husband with her little grunts. I keep glancing out the window for a nun to see me and drag me out of here by my ear.

  Mrs. Maxwell finishes and then says, “It would take me a while to get this dress to fit, but I have some very nice petite gowns.” She takes my hand to help me off of the stool and then leads me over to a rack of dresses that all look appropriate for five-year-olds with the puffy sleeves and lace. I can imagine what Tonya would say if she saw me in one of those; she’d tease me the rest of the semester.

  “Do you have thomething more…grown up?”

  “I can check in the back. Wait here a minute.” While she goes to rummage around the backroom, I squat down behind a rack of dresses to make sure no one sees me. I’m not sure how much longer I have before someone comes in here asking about me.

  It seems like an eternity before Mrs. Maxwell comes back with a light blue dress that’s sleeveless and free of any lace. “I think this should be your size,” she says. “Why don’t you go try it on?”

  “OK.” I take the dress from her and then step into the fitting room. It takes a minute to undo all the buttons of my blouse and then get my skirt off. The dress isn’t too hard to get on, though I’d need some help to zip up the back. The dress fits me almost like a second skin; in the mirror my face turns red to see myself looking so sexy. I give my hips a shake and then toss my hair. If it weren’t for the glasses and braces, I would look totally gorgeous.

  I step out of the fitting room so Mrs. Maxwell can get a look at the dress. She gasps; I hope it’s with surprise at how awesome I look. “My goodness, it fits perfectly.”

  I turn around and then brush back my hair. “Can you get the thipper?”

  “Of course, dear.” She zips me up, which makes the dress a little more snug, but not enough that I can’t breathe or anything. “You look very lovely.”

  “Thankth. How much ith it?”

  “Two hundred dollars.”

  “Oh.” I only have six dollars in my purse. “Um, could I pay you back later?”

  “I don’t know, what kind of credit do you have?” There’s an awkward moment of silence and then she chuckles. “I’m kidding, dear. I can mail the bill to your parents. Just give me your address.”

  My face turns warm and I look down sadly at my feet. “I don’t have any parentth. My thithter taketh care of me.”

  “I’m very sorry to hear that, dear. What’s your sister’s address?” I give her Jessica’s address; I hope she doesn’t freak out too much when the bill comes. Though she should be happy I’m acting like a normal girl instead of throwing grenades at criminals.

  “Can I wear thith out?”

  “You can, but it might be a little cold.”

  “No problem.” I go into the fitting room to put on my school uniform over the dress. The skirt of the dress is short enough that nothing shows; I’ll just have to be careful when I sit down so that my plaid
skirt covers everything.

  I give Mrs. Maxwell a hug before I leave the store. “Thank you tho much.”

  “It’s the least I could do for such a darling girl.” She tousles my hair the way her husband did and then I’m free to step back onto the street. I hurry back to the dentist’s office to find the nun waiting for me.

  “Where have you been, young lady?”

  “I wath jutht taking a look around.”

  “You could have gotten lost or hurt. Do you realize that?”

  “Yeth, Thithter.”

  “I expect you to tell Father Barclay about this at your next confession.”

  “I will.”

  “Good. Now go sit down.”

  “Yeth, Thithter.” I sit down on a chair and then pluck an old issue of Seventeen off the pile on the coffee table. I wait until the magazine is covering my face before I allow myself to smile.

  ***

  Melanie loves the dress when I show it to her. She squeals, at least until I cover her mouth so no one else hears. She whispers, “That’s so pretty. But I thought Sister Mary Francis said—”

  “I don’t care. I’m going to see Colin.”

  “How are you going to get there?”

  “I’ll call him. He can pick me up on his thnowmobile. We might have room for three.”

  “I wouldn’t want to be a third wheel—or whatever snowmobiles use.”

  “Thankth.” I give Melanie a hug. Then she turns around so I can take the dress off. I hide it in my closet until I need it. I don’t really have shoes that match, but I doubt Colin will care about what’s on my feet. At least I hope he’ll be too focused on the rest of me to notice.

  I wait until the next afternoon to call his cell phone. It would be great if I could text him, but I know Carol would kill me if I used the phone she gave to me for emergencies on something like this. Besides, it is nice to hear Colin’s voice. “Hey, babe,” he says. I can’t help giggling at that. “What?”

  “I don’t think anyone’s called me ‘babe’ before.”

  “Well you are my babe, aren’t you?”

  “Darned right. Anyway, I wanted to tell you I’m breaking out of here tomorrow night.”

  “Are you sure? I thought you said—?”

  “I want to see you again. And it’s Valentine’s Day. I don’t want to spend it cooped up with a bunch of nuns.”

  “That would suck.”

  “Can you come get me? Same spot as last time?”

  “No problem. At like seven?”

  “Sounds good. See you then.”

  “See you, babe.”

  I giggle again and then hang up the phone. All I have to do now is wait over a day to see him again. That should be easy and yet I can’t help feeling that every minute is pure agony. In every class I tap my pencil on my desk and my foot on the floor. I can’t help looking at the clock just about every minute to count down until I can get out of here.

  Dinner is the worst because I have to act like everything is normal. I want to throw the disgusting stew in the garbage and then go to my room, but I don’t want anyone to get suspicious. I sit there, forcing myself to gag down one spoonful after another.

  At six o’clock I can finally go back to my room to get ready. Melanie helps me to put my hair up and then zips me into the dress. “You look so pretty. Like Cinderella.”

  “It’s not that bad, is it?”

  She squeezes me in a hug. “Have fun. Don’t come back until at least midnight.”

  “I won’t. If anyone asks—”

  “I won’t tell them anything.”

  “Melanie—”

  “I don’t care. I’m not snitching on my best friend.”

  “Thanks.” I give her a hug this time. Then I get into my parka. I have my only pair of pumps in my backpack to change into later. For now I’m wearing my boots.

  Like last time I check to make sure no one is watching and then I hurry over to the stairs. I try not to make too much noise as I go down to the ground floor. Again I look to make sure there isn’t anyone around. I bolt out the side door—

  “Where do you think you’re going, young lady?” Sister Mary Francis says.

  I squeal with surprise to see her behind me. Before I can think to say anything, she yanks down the zipper of my parka to reveal the blue dress. “What is the meaning of this, Miss Howard?”

  “I’m…I’m—”

  “She’s going to the Valentine’s Day dance at the high school,” Tonya says. There’s an evil gleam in her eye as she adds, “She’s going to meet a boy there.”

  “A boy? You know fraternization without proper supervision is against the rules.”

  “But it will be supervised. There will be teachers there from the school.”

  “I see. And how were you planning to get there?”

  When I don’t answer right away, Tonya is all too happy to say, “Her boyfriend is going to pick her up. On a snowmobile.”

  “You…you bitch!” I try to grab Tonya, but Sister Mary Francis seizes me by the ear. I’m smart enough not to try to hit a nun. “I’ll get you for this!”

  “You hear that? She threatened me. She’s crazy, Sister Mary Francis.”

  “You can go, Miss Schmidt. I’ll handle her. Thank you for your assistance.”

  “Of course, Sister.” Tonya gives me a triumphant smirk as she saunters off. All I can do is let Sister Mary Francis drag me to the chapel, where I have to confess my sins to Father Barclay.

  “This is very serious,” the father says. “Do you understand how serious, child?”

  “Yes,” I grumble. My fists clench at him calling me a child. “I’m sorry.”

  “I’m afraid sorry won’t cut it. Sister Mary Francis and I will discuss what to do with you. In the meantime, I want you to say the Lord’s Prayer until you actually mean it.”

  “Yes, Father.” I have to get down on my knees in front of the altar to say the Lord’s Prayer. I only do it until the priest and nun have gone back into the rectory. Then I start focusing on various ways to destroy Tonya Schmidt.

  What I don’t understand is how she even found out about me. Melanie wouldn’t tell on me, would she? Maybe Tonya promised to include her at the popular girls’s table. Or maybe she has been working for Tonya all along. Or maybe some of Madame Crimson’s goons paid a visit to Melanie’s family; I wouldn’t put it past Tonya to waste her mother’s resources on something as petty as this.

  I start saying the Lord’s Prayer again when I hear the door to the rectory open. “Amen,” I finish.

  Father Barclay motions for me to stand up. I stare down at my feet to look as pitiful as possible as he says, “After some discussion, we’ve decided that to atone for your sins, you’ll report here after your last class. Doing chores around here ought to teach you the value of obeying your elders.”

  “Yes, Father.” I groan inwardly at the thought I’ll have to miss my sparring sessions with Sister Matilda. All because of that little bitch Tonya.

  Sister Mary Francis insists on dragging me back to my room. At least she doesn’t watch as I change out of the dress, into my nightgown. Melanie is smart enough to pretend to do her homework until the sister has gone. Then she manages to catch me before I dissolve into a sobbing heap on the floor.

  “What happened?”

  “It wath Tonya. The told on me!”

  “Oh my God. I’m so sorry.”

  “Now I can’t thee Colin,” I bawl. “He’th going to think I thtood him up!”

  “Hey, come on, I’ll go call him and tell him what happened. What’s his number?”

  I tell her the number; she writes it down on a page of her notebook. “What if he doethn’t believe you?”

  “I’m sure he will. Just stay here and try to relax, OK?”

  “OK.” She helps me onto my bunk. The last time I cried into my pillow was the night Daddy died. This isn’t the same, but I again feel like I’m losing something precious and irreplaceable.

  ***

&n
bsp; I skip breakfast, but by lunch I’m hungry enough that I go to the cafeteria. Of course Tonya can’t let me trudge by. She has to gloat. “Hey, Rothe. You’re looking like shit. Didn’t get much sleep, huh?”

  “Leave me alone.”

  ‘“Leave me alone,”’ she mocks me in a falsetto voice. “What were you going to do with a boy anyway? You’ve probably never even seen a penis.”

  “I have so.”

  “Slut,” her friends cough into their hands.

  There’s no winning this argument, so I start to walk away. “Hey, Rothe, you mind if I call Colin later? I’m sure he’ll be glad to finally have a real woman.”

  “You leave him alone!”

  “Or what? You’ll cry like a little baby? Wah, waaaah!” Her friends all start to laugh. My fists tighten on my tray. I should keep walking, but I can’t bring myself to do it. “He was never going to stay with you anyway. He was using you for practice.”

  “Shut up!” I screech. “This is your fault!”

  There’s no other way to say it except I go nuts then. I take one hand off of my tray so I can use it to hit Tonya in the face. While she’s reeling, I shove her chair backwards and then jump on top of her to pummel her with my bare fists. Sister Matilda says punching with your fists is a good way to break your hands, but at the moment I’ll gladly break every bone in my hands if it means breaking Tonya’s face. Not only did she stop me from seeing Colin, but also her mother is the one who killed Daddy, so it’s easy to keep channeling rage into my fists.

  It takes two nuns to pull me away. One of them is Sister Matilda. “Rose, stop this. Stop it right now!”

  “No! She’s ruined my life! I hate her!”

  “All this is going to do is get you expelled. Is that what you want?”

  “I don’t care!” I thrash against the grip of the two nuns. I manage to break free of one, but Sister Matilda keeps hold of me to prevent me from finishing Tonya off. She wraps one arm around me in a sleeper hold like something from WWE. I keep thrashing against her, but gradually my head gets lighter and my vision dimmer.

  I’m barely aware of when I sag onto the floor of the cafeteria.

  Chapter 20

  When I wake up, I’m in the infirmary. I try to get up, but my right arm won’t move. I turn to see a cuff holding me to a rail of a hospital bed. I jangle the cuff until the door opens. “You finally waking up?” Carol asks.