The Night's Legacy Page 7
Her subsequent spray-painting curse words all over the fraternity house had gotten her kicked out of the school. She had been more careful after that, avoiding the college jocks like Red and Blue T-shirts in Durndell. She had thought Tony was different. He wasn’t. He was just like those boys at Northwestern, except she wasn’t fifteen anymore. She was a grown woman and she was going to show him a grown woman’s revenge.
When she got home, she hoped Mom would be up to comfort her. But the note was still on the table, seemingly untouched. She wadded it up and then went upstairs to Mom’s room. She listened at the door for her mother’s snoring. Hearing nothing, she opened the door. The bed was empty and unmade. Mom had disappeared again. Was she looking for Lois? But the note didn’t look touched. Maybe she was sleepwalking or something.
With a sigh Lois went back to her room and took off Melanie’s dress. She threw herself on the bed, but didn’t cry into her pillows as she’d done when she was fifteen. Instead she looked up at the ceiling, thinking of that kiss again even as she plotted her revenge.
Chapter 6
Lois woke up again to Mom shaking her. Just like the previous morning, Mom was already fully dressed and ready to go. “Time to get up, sweetheart,” she said, not sounding the least bit tired.
“Yeah, great.” Lois crawled out of bed and headed straight for the bathroom. A lukewarm shower helped shake away some of the cobwebs. While she did her hair, she thought of the night before. That jerk Tony had ditched her at the club and then she’d gotten home to find Mom out of the house again. She frowned into the mirror, determined to get some answers on both fronts.
Mom had two bagels and a dish of cream cheese sitting on the table for her. “I know you don’t like pancakes,” she said. “Are bagels all right?”
“It’s fine.” Lois sat down, watching her mother closely. Mom took her protein shake from off the counter and then sat down across from her. “When did you buy bagels?”
“They were in the freezer.” Lois studied her mother’s face for any indication that she was lying, but there was nothing. “We’ll have to do some grocery shopping soon.”
Lois took a bite of the bagel. Cinnamon raisin, her favorite. How long had Mom kept these in the freezer? They tasted fresh enough, so not too long. Maybe she kept a few on hand just in case Lois came back.
When Mom raised the protein shake, Lois saw an angry purple bruise. “What the hell is that?”
“Language.”
“Don’t give me that. Where’d you get that bruise?”
Mom set the shake down and then rolled up her sleeve. “This? I slipped in the shower a couple days ago. It’s nothing serious.” This time her mother’s voice sounded strained and her eyes twitched to the right for just an instant.
“I didn’t see it yesterday.”
“Yesterday was pretty hectic. You probably didn’t notice.”
“I can tell you’re lying. I’m not a little kid anymore.”
Mom Glared at her. “You shouldn’t talk to your mother like that.”
“Don’t try to confuse the issue. I’ve seen the way you shuffle around, how it hurts you getting up and sitting down. And now that bruise? I want to know what’s going on.”
“There’s nothing going on, sweetheart.” Mom reached across the table to pat Lois’s hand. “It might be hard for you to accept, but I’m getting older.”
“You’re only fifty.”
“I know that, dear.”
“Well the way you look and the way you walk you seem more like seventy.”
“It’s just stress. I have a lot to deal with.”
“I know.”
“How could you know that? You haven’t been around in seven years.” The way Mom said this was with more scientific curiosity than spite.
“Dr. Johnson told me. So did Lorna. They’re worried about you. So am I.”
It would have been easy for Mom to throw Lois’s absence in her face, but she didn’t. Instead she gave Lois’s hand a squeeze. “You don’t need to worry about me. I’m fine.”
“If that’s true then let’s go to Dr. Pavelski—together. I want to hear it from her.”
“Lois, please, there isn’t time for that today.”
“Then make an appointment.”
Mom stared at her for a moment and then nodded. “I’ll have Lorna set something up for next week. Is that fine?”
“Yes. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome, sweetheart.” Mom checked her watch. “We’d best get a move on.”
* * *
Tony and Melanie were already upstairs when Lois entered the gift shop. Her eyes narrowed at Tony. “Melanie, could you go check on those new magnets?” Tony said.
“Sure,” she said. Lois passed the garment bag to her before she could scurry away, sensing that something was wrong.
“Lois, I can explain—”
She stabbed a finger into his chest. “You’d better. And it had better be good.” Looking into his eyes, she could feel the anger draining away. She latched on to her bad memories from Northwestern like a life preserver to rekindle her rage. “I thought you were different from the others. I thought you actually cared. But you don’t. You’re a jerk like all the rest.”
“I deserve that,” he said. “And a lot more. I’m so sorry, Lois. I didn’t mean to leave you there. I went to the bathroom and there was a guy I know there, an old college friend. We got talking and by the time I got back to the bar, you’d already gone.”
“Horseshit. I looked all over that place for you.”
“We must have missed each other.”
“No, I missed you. You didn’t give a damn about me.”
“Lois—”
“I think it’d be better if you work in the back today. Melanie and I can handle things out here.”
“Now look, I’m your boss—”
“If you want to keep being my boss then shut up and go count magnets or whatever. Otherwise I’m going upstairs and telling my mom what we did in the backseat.”
“You don’t need to threaten me.”
“Maybe not, but I want to. Get lost.”
Only after he was gone did she sink beneath the counter and cry. She felt Melanie’s hand on her shoulder. Melanie was a lot smarter than she sounded sometimes; she had already put two and two together. “You went out with Tony last night?” Lois nodded, her throat too choked with sobs to say anything. “What happened?”
“He ditched me at this club,” Lois managed to get out.
“Oh my God, that is so awful. If I’d known what a creep he was, I never would have salivated over him like I did. I totally put the thought in your head. I’m such an idiot!”
“You didn’t do anything. We met the night before I started working here.”
“You did?” The light bulb went on over Melanie’s head. “Oh my God, he was the one you were talking about last night!”
“Yes.”
“Ooh, he’s such a jerk!” Melanie pounded on the counter, which seemed ludicrous compared to how sunny she usually was. “What are you going to do?”
“I don’t know.” Lois wiped at her eyes. “Let’s just get to work.”
“Sure. We can think of how to get back at him later.”
Lois nodded, but she knew no petty revenge scheme could really make things right.
* * *
Tony risked sticking his head out of the stockroom three hours later. “Lois, could you come back here?”
Before Lois could say anything, Melanie shouted, “No way, Creep-O. She doesn’t want to have anything to do with you, right?”
“Right,” Lois said.
“See? So you can go get bent, jerk.”
Tony stepped out of the stockroom, a piece of paper clutched in his hands. “I made this for you,” he said.
“She doesn’t want it,” Melanie snapped. “She doesn’t want anything from you and neither do I.”
He held up the paper and Lois saw it was covered in Egyptian hieroglyphics. �
��I spent all morning on the phone with Dr. Johnson to write this. You want to know what it says?”
“No, and you know what you can do with that paper,” Melanie said. She took a step towards Tony, but Lois grabbed her shoulder to hold her back.
“Fine, what does it say?” Lois asked.
“It says, ‘I’m sorry about last night. I never wanted to hurt you. I really care about you and I would do anything if you’d forgive me.’”
Lois squinted at the paper. “It doesn’t really say that,” she said.
“Well, you might have to use your imagination a little, but that’s the gist of it.”
She looked into his eyes, trying to gauge how sincere he was. She took the paper from him and then growled, “I’ll forgive you this time. But this is your last chance, got it?”
“I got it. And I really am sorry, Lois. You’re a very special girl—”
“Save it for later,” Lois said as a customer sauntered in. “We’ve got work to do.”
She tucked the paper into her pocket for later. Once Tony had returned to the stockroom, Melanie sighed like a romantic heroine. “That was so cute,” she said. “I wish I could find a man like that.”
“I thought you said he was a creep and a jerk,” Lois said with a smile.
They laughed until the customer gave them a funny look. Once the customer bought a T-shirt and porcelain bell, Lois and Melanie laughed some more.
* * *
The next time Tony appeared it wasn’t anything romantic. It was time for Lois to go on lunch break. Seeing no one else around, she kissed his cheek and whispered into his ear, “I’ll see you later.”
Instead of going down to the cafeteria, Lois went upstairs to the fourth floor. Mom’s door was closed and Lorna stood up to bar the way. “She’s in there with a donor,” Lorna said.
“Oh. I was just going to see if she wanted to get lunch.”
“I’ll tell her you stopped by.”
“Thanks.” Lois turned to go but then stopped. She turned again to face Lorna. “Did she tell you make an appointment with Dr. Pavelski for us?”
Lorna stared at her. “No. Should she?”
Lois clenched her fists. “That lying bitch!” She glared at the door, expecting it to open, but apparently the donor inside was too important.
“Lois—”
“Don’t worry, I’m not going to break in there.”
Instead she turned on her heel and stormed back to the elevator. She took it to the first floor, stomping past the cafeteria and through the front doors. She had to wait a few minutes to flag down a cab to take her a dozen blocks down the road to Dr. Pavelski’s office. The office was still on the sixth floor, just as it had been when Lois first went there for her vaccinations. She couldn’t remember that day, but Dr. Pavelski had frequently raved about how good Lois had been.
She threw open the door to the doctor’s office. There were a half-dozen young to middle-aged women sitting inside. Dr. Pavelski was primarily an OB/GYN, but for Mom and Lois she had made an exception. Lois marched up to the reception window, where a fat woman looked up at her with a smile that made Lois want to punch her. “Hi, Lois. Lorna said you might be dropping by.”
“Where is she?”
“In her office. She can make a few minutes for you. Go on in.”
The friendliness of the receptionist didn’t disarm her initial anger. She redirected some of it at Lorna for stealing her big entrance. She was supposed to barge into Dr. Pavelski’s office to demand answers about Mom’s health. They had turned it instead into a somewhat routine visit.
Dr. Laura Pavelski sat behind her desk. Her dark hair was pulled back so tightly it looked as if it might tear right off her scalp. Like Dr. Johnson she had aged gracefully, just a few silver strands cropping up in her ponytail and a few new laugh lines when she smiled at Lois. “I heard you were back in town. You’re looking good. A lot healthier than I would have expected.”
“Yeah, well it was touch-and-go a couple of times,” Lois said. The first couple of years she’d gotten so skinny that her ribs had shown through her skin. A couple of times she got so ill from eating out of the trash that she had to be hospitalized—under a fake name of course. But eventually she managed to get the hang of living on the run.
“What brings you here today?”
“I’m sure Lorna already told you.”
“She just said you wanted an appointment for you and your mom. Ellen can take care of that up front.”
“Don’t patronize me. I want to know what’s going on with Mom. She’s hiding something from me.”
“You know I can’t disclose her medical history without her consent.”
“Has she told you about the bruise on her arm?”
“No, but most of my patients don’t tell me about every little boo-boo.”
“What about the way she shuffles around like a ninety-year-old? You going to tell me that’s normal for a woman her age? Or that she stays out all night?”
Dr. Pavelski sighed. “I’ll admit she’s not an ordinary case for her age.”
“You’re worried about her too. So is everyone else, but she keeps saying she’s fine.”
“She can be stubborn sometimes. Like someone else I know.”
Lois pointed a finger at the doctor. “Don’t joke with me! This is serious. I’m worried that she’s—” she had to force the last word out of her mouth, “dying.”
“She’s not dying. I can tell you that much. She had a mammogram two months ago. Everything came back normal. So did most of her other tests.”
“Most of them?”
“Her bone density is low. I’ve told her to take some calcium supplements.”
Lois glared at the doctor, trying to summon Mom’s authority as she did so. “There’s more, isn’t there?”
“You know I can’t tell you—” The phone on the doctor’s desk rang. She answered it and listened for a few seconds. “I know. She’s right here. No. If that’s what you want.” Then she hung up the phone.
“That was Mom, wasn’t it?”
“Yes. She said if you’re that concerned that I should tell you.” Dr. Pavelski stood up and then went over to a file cabinet. She needed only a few seconds to come back with a manila folder. Lois found Mom’s name on the folder. “That’s her medical history. You can read it in here while I go check on some patients. But it doesn’t leave this office, understand? Otherwise I could lose my license.”
“I understand.”
She waited until Dr. Pavelski left and then began leafing through the file. There was plenty to go through. Mom had first come to Dr. Pavelski’s office about twenty-four years earlier, when she was pregnant with Lois. There were the routine exams and some ultrasound pictures of Lois still in the womb.
She flipped past these to the records about the night she was born. Much to her disappointment there was nothing about her father in Dr. Pavelski’s notes. From what she had written, Betty had taken Mom to the hospital, where the doctor performed a C-section to take Lois out. There had been some trouble with the umbilical cord around her neck, but in the end Mom had given birth to a healthy, normal baby girl.
From there were more than twenty years of routine visits. Mom had begun getting regular mammograms when she was thirty-five. When she was forty she underwent a biopsy on her left breast. This came as news to Lois, who had been at Northwestern at the time. The biopsy came back benign. A couple of years later, she had gone through genetic testing to look for indicators of Alzheimer’s. That was routine since there was a family history with Aunt Gladys. Nothing showed up on that either.
She finally got up to the time after she had disappeared. Six months after her disappearance, Dr. Pavelski had noted Mom’s hair had turned gray and that she seemed even more distant than usual. She prescribed antidepressants, but the prescription was never filled. A few months later she had prescribed sleeping pills. Again the prescription was never filled.
Three years after Lois had vanished, Dr. P
avelski diagnosed Mom with arthritis in her wrists and knees. Medication was prescribed and this time Mom filled it, many times over. The doctor had noted the condition was irreversible and that more frequent visits would be needed to monitor it.
Lois came up to the months after Aunt Betty had died. Again there were prescriptions for antidepressants and sleeping pills that went unfilled. Dr. Pavelski had referred Mom to a psychologist, but a note indicated no appointment was made.
In the last couple of years the notes were fairly routine. The arthritis was still being monitored and the mammograms continued. Her mental state hadn’t improved much. Dr. Pavelski’s notes indicated, “The patient remains withdrawn but refuses any form of treatment.” That summed Mom up pretty well.
She shut the file and then stared at the desk for a while. When she heard the door open, she turned to face Dr. Pavelski. “It’s my fault, isn’t it? About the antidepressants and sleeping pills.”
“It’s not just your fault,” Dr. Pavelski said. She shut the door and then sat down next to Lois to look her in the eye. “Your mom’s under a lot of stress. A lot of it she created herself.”
“By having me, you mean?”
“No. By pushing herself to do too much. At the same time she’s never learned good coping strategies for all of that stress. She just keeps grinding away. It’s like when a car blows a tire; if you keep driving on it eventually you’re going to break the axles.”
“Are her axles broken?”
“Not yet, but she’s definitely driving on her rims right now.”
“So she is dying.”
“I wouldn’t say that. Her heart, lungs, and liver are still better than some thirty-year-olds I see. I’m more concerned about her mental state. She’s been heading for a breakdown for some time, especially after you left and then when Betty died.” Dr. Pavelski patted Lois’s knee. “I think having you back will help her out a lot. She blamed herself for driving you away.”